What really creates emotional intimacy

This is a poem on what really creates emotional intimacy. Read it with an open heart. Let its realness into your realness. Let it in, all the way.



What is it to be



What is it to be



to be unvarnished




to be naked face

naked body

naked soul

Naked man rests sideon in lake, head and shoulders revealed - showing the real self.Photo by Sarah Diniz Outeiro on Unsplash

to reveal

what you think

what you feel

what you struggle with

what you find easy


to reveal

your likes and dislikes

your secrets

your fantasies

your shadows


When you feel-sense

to reveal them


in that moment

to flow


with that person

to uncover


with a stranger

with a lover



Are a stranger and a lover

so different?

aren't they the same

in a fundamental sense?


Is their mask so different

from my mask

from my many masks


whether it's the same mask

or the opposite mask

similar conditioning

or an opposite childhood


when I show you inside

do you open or close

are you attracted

or repelled

or both


Me too

Oh, me too



I notice frozen faces

so many people with

frozen faces

stiff faces

closed faces

holding their faces rigid

keeping their innards 'safe'

Black rigid statue of a person gazing downward, no features (Winchester Cathedral, UK).Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

They can't seem to smile anymore


They can't seem to cry anymore


They can't seem to be angry


They can't seem to be fearful

and shiver


They are all those things

and they hold them all back

split them off

squash them down

project them out


They don't even know who they are


they don't even know

they are so confused

so in pain

so numb


I am them too

I notice I smile when I am hurt

I notice I laugh when I want to cry

I get calm when I am angry

I get blank when I am fearful


I notice

I share it with others

it's a step toward

unfreezing my face

taking off my masks

freeing up my body


It's a step toward dancing

in the rain

or sobbing

in the rain

whichever takes me

Woman in gumboots splashing in a puddle in the rain, starting to dance.Photo by Vidar Nordli-Mathisen on Unsplash

It's a step toward living

Living life alive!

a step toward intimacy


and show me you too


I want to see you!

I want you to see me



It's a step toward turning

all the lights on

in an abandoned house

which had all the lights off


saying, "Look at me

a simple human

an everyday person

actually being

a simple human

an everyday person


actually letting myself live

letting life in

letting love in and out

letting you in

letting myself out


No more masks

they never truly kept me safe

they were halfway-to-dead

and all I care about now


is being wide open

to Life

Butterfly perches on a man's dirty hand.Photo by Elijah O'Donnell on Unsplash

letting it sing me

letting it dance me in the rain

weep me in the rain


letting Life in."

~Sair Gryphon